Rachel worries that she worries so much. She’s anxious about a
lot of things, but her biggest concern is people and what they think of
her. She doesn’t want the boss to see her limitations. She doesn’t want
friends or fellow church members to notice her flaws. She’s afraid that
God will reject her if she leaves a single sin unconfessed, and she’s
equally concerned about her spouse’s safety, success, and eternal
security. Her uncertainties are focused on issues that bother most of
us some of the time. But, at this point, Rachel’s fears have become
acute and constant. If she doesn’t learn to doubt her anxious thoughts,
they will destroy her.
Like 20 million other Americans, Rachel is suffering from an
anxiety disorder that leaves her disproportionately worried, irritable,
explosive, distracted, depressed, and sleepless. She avoids people and
situations
that trigger panic attacks, but her avoidance mechanisms rob her of
opportunities. They compromise her quality of life. How can people like
Rachel (and you and me) be free of undue fear and at the same time heed
what Gavin de Becker, author of The Gift of Fear, calls our
“brilliant internal guardian”? Fear is nature’s strongest survival
signal, says
de Becker.1 It cues us to danger,
alerts us to potential hazards, and reminds us not to play with guns or
stray into dangerous neighborhoods. Such fear is not to be confused
with apprehension (dread of some future disaster likely to
befall us). Apprehension is immobilizing. Fear is energizing.
In reality, threats of harm come at us from every direction:
war, terrorism, politics, movies, TV, even religion. The psychological
fallout of 9/11 is a fact of life. But many people are tormented by
unwarranted fears—terrified when alone, scared of crowds, nervous when
speaking in public, afraid to make decisions, horrified at the prospect
of making a mistake. A scriptural example of unhealthy fear is the man
who buried his lone talent because he was afraid of failure.2
Conditioned to fear
When fear holds us back from personal growth or keeps us from
taking reasonable risks, it is inappropriate and destructive, suggests
Dr. Susan Jeffers. Crippling anxiety is a result of prior
conditioning. “I’ve never
heard a mother call out to her child as he or she goes off to school
‘Take a lot of risks today, darling.’ ” She is more likely to convey the
message be careful, dear, which implies that the world is a
dangerous place.3 Who can argue with
that?
Medical professionals aren’t sure what causes healthy fear to
become unhealthy anxiety, but most agree that stressful experiences
(such as early trauma) create imbalances in brain chemistry that
contribute to anxiety disorders, social phobias, panic attacks, etc.
In the 1970s, scientists
began developing studies designed to map pathways in the brain
pre-programmed to respond to danger. They learned that fear-related
learning takes place in an area of the brain called the amygdala,
a small, almond-shaped sectionthat receives signals of potential danger
and
triggers self-protective mechanisms.4
The fear response is healthy in most people. But in others, it is
distorted by learning associated with trauma, which lowers the neural
set point for alarm. “The imprint of horror in memory—and the
resulting hypervigilance—can last a lifetime,” according to Dr. Daniel
Goleman, author of Emotional Intelligence.5
Resetting emotional alarm systems
Is it possible for us to reset our emotional alarm systems?
Can we unlearn irrational, limiting thoughts and beliefs? Yes and no.
Cognitive-behavioral therapies have been successful in “training”
somepeople to think and behave more rationally, but brain imaging tests
indicate that the over-aroused amygdala does not always respond to such
training. A lifetime of therapy designed to alter behavior will not
stifle the abnormal fear response in these individuals.6
In such cases, medication can be helpful, but many hesitate to take
prescribed medicine because they’re afraid they will become dependent or
someone will accuse them of being weak or God will fault them for lack
of faith. I don’t believe God would fault anyone for accessing
available medical resources, but we each have to make that decision for
ourselves.
If our fears can’t be ignored or extinguished by
pharmaceuticals or psychotherapy, can they be controlled or managed in
someother way? Attempts to control fear often exacerbate it, according
to psychologist Robert Sardello. “If we approach fear by hoping to stop
it through external means alone, we are bringing the wrong tools to bear. The real
power of fear resides in our wish to avoid it.” When we try to repress
fear, it gets stronger. Sardello suggests that we learn to value our
fears. “This is not to say we need to invite them in, but to understand
that they are already here, all around us, someaffecting us more, some
less.”7 We begin to find comfort when
we accept and acknowledge our feelings.
Bible characters and fear
How did biblical characters handle fear? They frequently
faltered in its face! Overwhelmed by political and military threats,
David acted out sexually and suffered dire consequences. At other
times, he employed more effective coping mechanisms, such as prayer and
creative endeavors (poetry and music). Although Abraham once insisted
that Sara lie to quell his fears, he ultimately surmounted fear and
became a man of faith. Terrified of their enemies, the children of
Israel hesitated to fulfill God’s promise, retreated to the wilderness
to learn important lessons, and finally moved forward in faith. Fear of
disapproval led Peter to deny his relationship with Jesus, but his
failure led to the formation of an exemplary character.
Notice the following testimonies: David said, “When I am
afraid, I will
trust in you.” Moses advised, “Be strong and courageous . . . for the
Lord your God goes with you. . . . He will never leave you nor forsake
you. Do not be afraid; do not be discouraged.” And Joshua admonished
the anxious children of Israel to “be strong and very courageous.”8
Healthy fear calls forth wisdom, inspires caution, and
instructs us to avoid dangerous people and places. Everyday,
run-of-the-mill anxieties (fear of criticism, fear of change, and fear
of disapproval) call forth courage. They provide an opportunity for us
to step onto a spiritual path and move forward boldly, which increases
strength of character.
Facing fear with faith
The ability to face fear courageously requires three kinds of
faith: (1) God-reliance, (2) self-reliance, and (3) people-reliance. God-reliance
is trusting God to do for us what we can’t do for ourselves. Self-relianceinvolves
becoming physically fit, building emotional strength, and developing
social skills. We may need to turn to counselors who can help us
develop competencies such as healthy self-talk, communication and
boundary-setting skills, relaxation skills, and other coping
strategies. When people grow to their full stature as adults and fully
occupy their space, they feel less vulnerable.
People-reliance directs us to mobilize support from
trustworthy peers when it is needed. Supportive people can help allay
our irrational fears
and offer strength and safety in the presence of real danger.
Apart from family and church, which are good sources of encouragement,
12-step groups such as Obsessive-Compulsives Anonymous, Emotions
Anonymous, and Al-Anon provide powerful protocols for countering
anxiety and fear. They help participants to grow up and take charge of
their lives, which automatically lowers anxiety levels and reduces
fear. In some cases, the negative-thinking habit is so deeply ingrained
that professional help may be required. This can be found in outpatient
mental-health programs or intensive residential programs, such as those
offered at The Bridge to Recovery and similar facilities.
It is possible to develop greater faith in God, in
ourselves, and in others. We can enjoy freedom from undue
anxiety! The apostle Paul describes the ideal antidote to fear, one
that promises to bring relief: “Do not be anxious about anything,” he
says, “but in everything, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. And
the
peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your
hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.”9
Carol Cannon is the clinical director at The Bridge, a treatment center for addictive
disorders in Bowling Green, Kentucky.
